Ah... The City of Brotherly Love never fails to live up to its name.
A while ago my friend, Mayra, flew in from Oregon to stay with me for a few days and experience the east coast for the first time ever! It was exciting and exhausting. We did many things, including a day trip to New York which involved miles of walking and skating to fit in all the things we wanted to see. (you can view the photo gallery of her visit here)
One thing you know we had to do... drink! Philly has a fine thing called a city wide - a cheap beer and a cheap shot - for $5. Only available in the finest of establishments.
And it was while drinking city wides in a dive bar that we witnessed two types of people. A sleezebag and a hero. Allow me to extrapolate.
Here we were, just ordered a beer after a mile walk, sipping off to the side of the bar and talking to one another, minding our own business. Suddenly a man definitely older than my dad walks right up, crowding into the space between us. Now, I don't mind older men... at all. Even though this gentleman wasn't nice to look at (none of that Robert Downey Jr., salt and pepper, handsome charm), I was willing to hear him out.
"Hey there." He said bluntly, and then nothing.
"Hi," I responded, and then a pause... "Are we in your way or something?"
"No," he said, still standing entirely too close. "I just came to say hello."
"Oh... okay hi." I said, starting to feel like something was off.
"So, where are you ladies from?"
I told him we were a long way from home and then he made a cringe-worthy joke about us coming down from Heaven, then proceeded to place his hand on Mayra's lower back, right above her left butt cheek.
Oh no. I was not having it. Two years now on the east coast had me well equipped for a moment like this. I immediately grabbed his glass from the table and touched it to his chest, pushing him back with it and using my other hand to shoo him away.
"Huh uh. Nope. We are not doing this." I said as he feigned confusion, not in a hurry to leave. He started to protest when another man came up behind him, wrapping one arm around him to caress his chest and laying his head on the creep's shoulder. The second stranger was quite a bit younger, closer to my age, and gave me a wink as he said, "Hey, baby."
Sick! This is his lover, they get off on this shit! I thought as I mentally prepared myself to fight both of these twisted people and cause a scene. It turns out I was wrong. As our creep turned around, I noticed that he didn't know the man who had been fondling him a moment earlier. It was in that moment, that half a beat, that I realized what was happening. A random guy in the bar had been witnessing the interaction, saw from afar that it was not decent, and came to step in.
He continued touching the old creep and hitting on him, saying things like, "I don't know about you, but I see myself kissing you tonight. Waddya say?" and other pickup lines equally as greasy as the ones the newly turned victim had been using just moments before on us. He grew increasingly uncomfortable and left without offering a parting salutation.
As soon as he was gone I grabbed the young stranger's arm. "I love you. I love you so much," I said to him, clutching my pearls, astonished at the cleverness and brashness of this wonderful person.
He explained quickly that he was there with his girlfriend, who he'd left mid-conversation without a word, and backed away from us, returning to her side before we could properly thank him.
I turned to Mayra, and we stood there for a minute, eyes wide and palms pressed to temples, saying, "Holy moly. I can't believe that just happened! What an outstanding guy."
I was still fired up, and we recounted what had just happened to one another several times before calming down a little, sipping our beer, and returning to a regular cadence and conversation. We witnessed the older guy being escorted from the bar a few minutes later, presumably after making another patron uncomfortable.
All night I couldn't stop talking about the pure genius of the straight man who didn't just stop a creep from inappropriately touching two young women, but without hesitating, immediately put the offender into the same uncomfortable situation, diffusing the situation and then returning to his business of drinking with his girlfriend on a Friday night. I will not forget this for a very long time.
