Black Lives Matter is not an issue of politics, but one of humanity.

Time and time again since the Black Lives Matter movement started gaining traction, I've seen people take up metaphorical arms on the internet. As for me, I've been fighting with family on Facebook since I started vocalizing my support of the movement. I've seen others do the same - calling out friends and family members in righteous anger. 

We are all emotionally charged about this. We all feel like we are definitely in the right. But I keep seeing the conversation go way off track. Too many times, politics are brought into it. I'm thinking of a specific recent post of mine. 

I shared a short comic strip that illustrated the dichotomy of those who demanded justice for Cannon Blake Hinnants, a five-year-old boy who was shot in his front yard a few weeks ago, killing the innocent child. The kid's death is indeed a terrible tragedy, but the local police department treated it as such. They utilized all of their resources (their own words) to locate and arrest the main suspect, within 24 hours even, but nonetheless, conservative Americans launched a campaign for justice using Cannon Blake as its face, boldly saying that the media was intentionally not covering his death while unnecessarily over-covering the death of George Floyd.

Disclaimer: I looked for the original of this comic posted by poorlydrawnlines.com, but could not find it. It may be that someone edited the original comic with the above text.

The comic strip illustrates a man demanding justice for the child's murder, another man holding up a file and stating that justice had already been found, to which the first man set fire and said, "I don't want justice. I want black people to shut up about being murdered by police."

This, of course, spurred lots of heated conversation in the comment section. I understand that everyone is worked up right now. We all feel the need to defend our opinions to the death because it could mean life or death for some of us - or at the very least, an undecided future (ahem, scary!). But I was unpleasantly unsurprised to see the comments turn political. I didn't think Trump or Biden or any politician had anything to do with this. But there they were, several memes slandering Joe Biden stacked on top of each other, and plenty of other off-topic stuff besides.

I hate this stuff. It's not about democratic or republican views. At all! It's not about who you vote for, but what your morals are, how the situations differed from each other, how they are the same, what the community's involvement in each was. Are there other occurrences of this type of behavior? Are there ways we could make a difference so we have less of it in the future? How were the parties involved treated? Does that line up with our morals? What could we do about it?

If we had these conversations instead, we would probably find that we have a lot more in common. Mainly the common goal: to stop unnecessary killing of innocent lives. I think we are all on board there. But it's hard to stop being mad. Sometimes we'd rather die on that hill.

I have been guilty of letting my emotions get the better of me, but I'm going to try harder to keep the conversations geared toward productive conversation. Hopefully, those family members who are disappointed in me and think that I must be ill informed or naive will stick around and participate in the conversation, too.

But to make a difference at all, I may need some help. Who else is willing to stay on topic with me?

If that's you, consider sharing this post or adding a comment below.

Till next time,

Xx Alison

America from a Distance

I was recently speaking with a Dutch friend of mine about the current state of America.


I haven't spoken or written about it much in the last few weeks. I wanted to hit the issue hard when the death of George Floyd spurred millions into action and left millions of others confused, but listening. I even have a podcast episode recorded, what was supposed to be the first in a series about the systems in America that do NOT serve the American people, that I haven't even edited, though it's weeks old. Unfortunately, my schedule just straight up doesn't allow for it right now. I struggled with the guilt of that for a while, but as an Au Pair who works 30 hours a week already for very little pay, plus developing my own sources of income via freelance work online, I already have enough to make myself crazy with. I have to move from this place in 6 weeks, and I need to focus on making arrangements for where I will go after this. But I feel that I must do something to make America better, and that's what I told my friend today as we went back and forth over the problems America faces and why they are such complicated issues.

One huge problem I see, I tell him, is that so many Americans have no idea how bad they have it.

This is interesting when you think about how foreigners view America. They chuckle at us a lot. We are loud, we are proud; we are in your face.

I actually like that about my country, but when pride is paired with ignorance, it just isn't a good look. Foreigners laugh and shake their heads at America and say things like, "We don't understand why these policies are still in place. Not only are they still in place, but you Americans support them." Ok, I adlibbed this, but I've gotten a lot of chuckles and head shakes and "I don't understand"s, so I'm taking this liberty.

I think it has something to do with the fact that Americans have no idea what happens outside of our borders. It's almost frowned upon if you do. That goes against our belief that America is the best. If you think any other country does anything better, you should just move there! ...The adult equivalent of "If you love it so much then why don't you marry it?" It's sometimes just as easy to legally marry your favorite dessert as it is to immigrate to a new country. Seriously... Have you ever applied for a visa anywhere? Well, a lot of other countries have health care and infrastructures that actually work, so if you can't prove on paper that you're going to financially or educationally contribute to their society, they probably won't let you just move there. So... we should probably make our country better.

But again, there are SO MANY PEOPLE who don't think our country needs to get better. And it comes down to the fact that we don't know how bad we have it. Because we don't know what other countries are doing. Most Europeans can tell you quite a bit about America; about our policies, our current events, our culture, the problems we face, the things that work well... Is it because America is just that important? Maybe it's because we're just that loud. Maybe it's because citizens of other first world countries are more educated, well-traveled, culturally sensitive, and rational than we are. America might be better than some third world countries, but we're definitely not the best of the first world countries just because we're the biggest.

Europeans do have opportunity over us. With America being as incredibly vast as it is, we don't come in contact with other cultures, other societies, to see how they do things. It's allowed us to carry on the idea that America is the only country that matters. Which countries border us? Mexico and Canada. Far north and far south. A LOT of us have never been. MOST of us couldn't tell you anything about their history, their government, their social systems, or their cultures, much less other countries around the world. This can be very dangerous, because the government can get away with murder if none of its citizens knows there's more out there. I think they probably know this. I'm not under the impression that the education system receives budget cuts because uneducated or undereducated members of society is actually what's best for America. And same goes with patriotism. It's in the powerful persons interest to support the notion that America is the best and most kickass country in the world, and that anyone who argues doesn't belong. It keeps everyone from looking around and going, "Wait... you're not looking out for me. You're looking out for yourself!"

We don't do that enough in the U.S.
We don't question our government. Instead, we blame our neighbor that VOTED for THAT GUY who enacted that STUPID policy that's holding us all down!!!! We place zero responsibility on the government. The responsibility is all on the American people. It's your responsibility to feed and clothe yourself. It's your responsibility to earn your own opportunities. It's your responsibility to pick your own self up when you're down. Its your responsibility to pay for your mistakes. It's your responsibility to break your back, give your entire life to fighting and working for a place in the world. Meanwhile, there other societies who don't have to fight so hard, and still reap the benefits. We don't HAVE to do it all ourselves (and to be honest, that way of living is unsustainable). Some of them actually work together. And look out for each other. And don't shame one another about every damn thing.

Is it that crazy of an thought that somewhere in the world, someone might have had a great idea that America hadn't thought of yet? Shouldn't we just see?

To Serve and Protect, or To Hunt and Suspect?

Good morning my fellow Americans!


I'm back at it with my morning coffee, and my mission to bring everyone to the realization that we are actually all in this together. You ready for some.... (cringe) togetherness?

On my desk today: a collection of stones and shells, a painting of
George Floyd I'm working on for the online shop, coffee with
cream and a breakfast I've gotten used to here in the Netherlands -
bread with peanut butter (pindakaas) and chocolate sprikkels on top.

Today, let's talk about the responsibility we have to our fellow Americans.

I think we're all getting a little lost in the argument and we're ignoring the real issue here. People from both sides are quick to discount the opposition's opinions about the state America is in and what we should do about it, if we should act at all. Well, I use the word opposition here not because its an accurate description of the relationship between two Americans, but that's one way to look at it when you see some of the dialogue that is happening right now.

But if we are not actually on opposing sides, then what are we? And why are we fighting? Well, a lot of cops are shooting Americans and asking questions later, and the numbers show that it happens disproportionately more to Black Americans, which points to prejudice. You see, when you kill, restrain, tase, and take down based on suspicion or self preservation and not on the premise of innocent until proven guilty, you have a very large opportunity set for making a mistake. After these incidents occur, the waters are muddy. The policeman was scared, he thought the citizen had a gun, he feared for his life, he acted out of self defense, etc. But any way you skin it, unarmed Americans are being shot first and asked questions later, which is dangerous for all of us. To be clear, we're not talking about an unfortunate accident here. We're seeing it happen more and more, and that's why we're seeing such civil unrest here. (For the real numbers, visit https://mappingpoliceviolence.org/unarmed)

For most of my friends and family, it's easy to chalk this all up to inner city living. I came from a very rural place. We value honesty, simplicity and practicality. We like to think that a person's life is a direct reflection of their actions, and we have a tendency to assume that if someone died at the hands of a police officer, it was the result of some poor choices they made. Just a couple years ago, we all watched a small militia group take up arms against the federal government over the rights to some land out in boonies. The whole thing ended with the leader of the group dying at the hands of the police force, but only after he fled, led them on a pursuit involving road blocks and a helicopter, and reached for his weapon. It's easy to see situations like this and try to make a comparison to other Americans that police officers kill. Sometimes we read about the lives of the people that were victims of police brutality and we think, Well, maybe society is better off now that they're dead... Don't feel bad. It's human nature to try to make sense of things like this.

The thing is, we all enjoy the citizenship of America, which means we are all bound to its values and rules of conduct. And we decided long ago that this situation where cops have the power to decide who dies and who doesn't is not how we do things. Think of how police officers are represented in our children's cartoons: they are there next to firefighters, EMTs and other groups that are supposed to help our communities. American citizens are supposed to be innocent until proven guilty. Justice should not be carried out by the police officer, and in the case of an accident where he does, it should be very seriously addressed, because we have an entire justice system for a reason. Americans have a right to be lawfully detained, treated with respect, and appear in front of a judge to receive the fair punishment for their actions, based on rules that we've all agreed on as a society. To cut out that process is an abuse of power, accident or not. And when we see it, no matter what the victim's skin color is or what circumstances are around it, we should be scared. A police force that is desensitized to the weight and severity of killing American citizens, especially citizens who are unarmed, is one that is dangerous for the entire society.

I'm not at all saying that all police precincts are evil or that all cops are bad. I disagree with a lot of the BLM protesters because of this. Someone on twitter argued with me that a good cop could not survive in a corrupt culture like the American police force, so they must not exist. This is almost laughable, but this mindset is gaining traction. It's harder and harder to see a group of people originally designed to protect and serve killing those its sworn to help without losing hope in the whole outfit. But yes, even cops that have done racist shit in the past want to help their communities and by and large, don't believe in genocide, homicide, or any other atrocious act.

I think what has happened is that the modern American police officer is surrounded by the suggestion that they are on a noble mission to catch the bad guy. I think they focus more on that than serving and protecting, although I'm sure they believe that they are serving and protecting by preventing more crime from happening later. But I have a vision of a police force that is ready to help, easy to find, can be trusted by the American people, and leaves it to the justice system to decide if someone is a good guy or a bad guy. I have a vision of a police force that does not hide around the corner, plan in secret, and hunt down the American criminal.

One thing I want to point out is that it's not just African Americans that feel they cannot trust the police. Lots of other citizens have had very unpleasant encounters with officers. What do we do when we see lights in the rearview mirror? I don't know about you, but I start cursing under my breath, my heart rate quickens. I start wondering how completely screwed I am, what hoops I will have to jump through if a ticket or citation is written, and how this will affect me financially and otherwise. My white privilege means I've never viewed this situation as a threat on my life, but I'm still usually scared, anxious or unsure in this moment. Other times, too.

I remember a time when I was living in New Jersey and I didn't get off work until after midnight. I worked in the mall, and we had spent hours of gruesome panty restocking in the type of hell that is unique to Victoria's Secret stores. When I finally left the building, the busses were no longer running and I was going to have to skateboard down 5 miles of highway to the nearest train station in the dark and cold if I didn't find another option. I didn't know any of my coworkers very well, and since New Jersey is the worst state to drive in in the country, I didn't feel comfortable asking anyone for a ride. I saw a police officer parked and patrolling across the street. I asked if he could give me a ride to the station. I was tired, cold and a little nervous about making the trek, but he said he couldn't leave his post and was unable to give me a ride. Nor did he help me out in any other way besides giving me directions. He was working on catching the bad guy, I assume.

I know there are so many more stories where Americans have been shafted by police. Generally speaking, it's not a culture of support, contrary to every Paw Patrol episode I've ever seen. A friend I went to high school with complains that once they get you into the system, they want to keep you there. He had troubles with drug abuse a couple years ago, and has since dealt with years of checking in with condescending probation officers, giving pee samples, required weekly check ins that make it hard to maintain a regular working schedule, and all of it costs him hundreds upon hundreds of dollars. One little slip up earns him years more of expensive moral babying from the government.

Millions of women don't report cases of domestic abuse or sexual assault, because as it turns out a lot of cops don't listen, can't help and don't have answers. I guess most of the time it seems pretty hopeless for us females, and there are a lot of police officers out there who have actually sexually assaulted Americans in their custody. Woah, what???? Yes. The relationship between police officers and women is shaky at best. A woman who's never had to contact the police over a sexual assault charge is lucky. Maybe I'll give this topic more attention in the future. It absolutely deserves it.

So the question is not whether or not to reform our policing system, the question is how to do it. And if you still don't agree with me, I'm going to argue that just because you don't have an issue with the police yourself, doesn't mean you are not a part of the conversation. If you live in America, you fight for freedom for your fellow man. You fight for domestic tranquility, you fight for equal opportunity and real justice. You cannot and should not want to silence your fellow American, especially invalidate their claims against a government that governs over you as well, lest it come back later to bite you in the ass. Just because your life is not on the line right now does not mean that this issue does not concern you.

We should all expect the same thing out of our police force: to be first responders, to treat those it detains with respect, to provide community support when they can, to be the brawn and not the hand of justice in our communities, to take those who are acting in a way that doesn't align with our values and safely place them into custody until the American public can decide what to do with them, through the avenues we've been using and refining since our union formed. We should all expect them to serve and protect, not hunt and suspect. I think even police officers will benefit from this relationship. Imagine if there were less killing. Wouldn't that be nice?

And this is basically where both my military friends and I all came to agreement. Which brought on the next questions... How do we fix it? Where do we go to work?

My cousin and I decided that a good place to start is in dialogue with our local police precinct. A few of the questions I can think of to ask them are listed below, and I'm hoping that others will add to the list.

What are the police forces core values?
Do you feel that the culture you portray is generally adhered to?
Do you feel that the core values you hold lift up the community and serve the American citizen?
What is the procedure for handling a complaint against a police officer?
What disciplinary actions are involved?
Is it common to have a complaint against an officer? If so, what are the common ones?
Do you currently employ any officers that have unresolved complaints filed against them?
Have you had any incidents in the past few years? If so, what was done to address them?
What are your views on the current issue?
Which changes are you going to make to bolster the relationship between officer and citizen?
In which ways can we abandon stealth and suspicion for support and service?
Has the current Black Lives Matter movement changed your mind or made you see your procedures differently? Which ones?
How can the community support you in supporting us?


I look forward to reading your thoughts and additions.

Be well,
Alison

Why I'm Not Mad About Racism

Today I'm using this affirmation. I chose "learning from" the World Around Me because...
well, you'll have to read the post ;)

Good morning free people of America,

I am sipping coffee in my bed and thinking about racism this morning, but it is not with a heavy heart. I see a nation of people standing up against something together and I have something noble to fight for.

Over the last week I've been doing my research to educate myself about what is going on. I don't approve of racism or murder, so it's easy to get behind the Black Lives Matter movement. I've posted a few things on Facebook and spurred some conversation, plus I've been talking with friends and family members about it.

It's not that I'm some expert, but I don't think that matters. I have this strong belief that its more about asking the right questions in a group conversation than offering the right solution, or offering a solution at all.

In my interactions, there's been one goal: find common ground.

I have a very diverse group of friends and family. Growing up in a conservative farm town and now living in probably the most liberal country in the world, Holland, the friends I've kept or made along the way all view this issue very differently. But as we go back and forth about what is the real issue here, I hear from all of them that murder is wrong.

As my Republican friends affirm that white people are killed by police officers, too, I do not hear opposition, I hear common ground. None of us are saying that murder is a-okay! That's something! So if an American citizen being killed by police officers is a red flag, shan't we all address it? Once we realize that we have the same goal we can start to have a conversation about the ways we can come together and affect change. Even the police force can get on board!

Opening these conversations can sometimes make one feel weary and hopeless, because it opens up a whole can of worms. The issues are deeply intertwined and complicated. One bad result is caused by a million compounded decisions that were all made for the greater good, and we easily veer off track and begin blaming whichever parties were responsible for making them. I'm just gunna come out and say it, it's all pretty fucked.

By and large, Americans agree that there are major flaws in some of our systems. The prison system is entirely overpopulated and full of innocent people. Although marijuana use is now legal, men and women all over the country still remain behind bars serving time for growing, using, selling, or carrying the substance.

Our police brutality numbers are incredibly high, and we hear people from all over the world in total wonder at why Americans are dying at the hands of police officers at all. Funded by taxpayer dollars, the police forces in America equip themselves with stealth vehicles, come up with special task forces, and go undercover to sniff out and eradicate "bad guys", but we've all felt screwed over by a police officer before. So many of us have filed a report about a very traumatic event and found the officers unable or unwilling to help. There are millions of Americans who have, at one point or another, been disappointed in our system, felt hopeless and downright angry. This is not to say that every police officer is a bad person. I believe a lot of police officers want to enrich their communities, but I think their approach is all wrong. Americans shouldn't be afraid that the police are watching them, waiting around the bend, they should feel comfortable confiding in them and helping them maintain a strong, healthy community.

The health care system is a subject of constant debate, since millions of Americans living in poverty don't get good enough coverage, middle working class America can't afford it, and while we're on the topic of health care, half of the country is hooked on opiods. (This is not a real statistic, for you sticklers.) Many of those who get addicted to narcotics abuse them until they can't afford them anymore and end up on the streets. The homeless population is crazy high and a lot of them are disabled, mentally ill, or addicted to substances. Refuge centers have to turn them away. Cities don't have enough resources.

These are just a few of the many problems America faces, and like I said, it can get pretty tiring. But the reason that I don't feel tired, or that I don't have a heavy heart when I think about the current status of America, is because I think a lot of us agree on which problems are a problem, its just that we disagree about who's made the best decisions so far about said problems - and which person should be in charge of making them in the future.

But I've come to the simplest realization! (Don't smack me, please.) It is as follows... that: a) we don't need to argue about who was right in making the decisions, or figure out which person must carry the blame for it, because we are simply saying it doesn't currently work in said conditions and b) that we are all in charge of making future decisions! Because, democracy! Hell yeah, America!

So yes, as I sit here with my coffee and formulate ways to save the lives of Black Americans, I am hopeful... and ready. Ready to start conversations with people in my community, thinking not of placing blame but of needing each other's input. Ready to find which causes I think need the most urgent change and finding like-minded individuals that I can grab hands with. Ready to take advantage of the fact that right now, we are all listening.

Let's do this.



P.S.
Upon reading this a second time, I realize that the whole thing is disgustingly cheery. And yes, I realize it is an oversimplification of a very complicated issue. You must forgive me, I'm a morning person.
P.S.S.
It turns out I'm still pretty pissed about racism.
P.S.S.S.
But my theme of coming together still stands.

Too much fun!

Happy Saturday everyone!

Every day this week has been Saturday for me. Ever since I moved to Cherry Hill, NJ (three long days ago) I've been going into the city every day. It only takes me 20 minutes or so to get to Philadelphia from my house, and it's been irresistible!

Maciah and I keep meaning to look for jobs, but never quite make it that far. We'll get the old laptop we're sharing and head to a coffee shop for internet access and end up drinking beer at a neat outdoor bar we can't help but stop at. Then all of the sudden it's 1 a.m. and we're taking tequila shots with three very nice state troopers whom we met over a game of cornhole. At least that was Thursday night!

Philadelphia is so much fun, actually everything is, because everything is new and exciting. We are learning the area and loving every minute of it. There is a lot of history here, we are hoping to get bikes this weekend and ride around Philly touring the museums and historical points of interest. They have the Liberty Bell here! And there's a place called Independence Hall we've been dying to go to where they signed the Declaration of Independence! Not only is it rich in culture and history, but it's beautiful. I've been sketching everything I see, whenever I can.

We did manage to do something productive yesterday, after sleeping off our hangovers. We walked 3 miles to Goodwill for sheets, blankets, pans and other essentials. I guess sleeping with beach towels and folded up hoodies as pillows finally got old. 

That's the thing, too... we've been walking everywhere. Each day we walk at least 2 miles, and a since we moved, we've walked over 30, according to Maciah's Garmin smart watch. We are getting so much exercise here, it's great! Of course, I should mention that we're discovering some things the hard way. Like that 3 mile walk I was talking about? Well we were a few blocks from our destination when we looked to our left and saw the train station for the transit that runs right by our house... we could've boarded the train 4 blocks from home and been a quarter mile from the Goodwill in less than 10 minutes...

Anyway, in the next couple days we are definitely going to buckle down and start the job search. Vacation has to end at some point. There are a few casinos in Philly, coffee shops everywhere, temp agencies, restaurants... opportunity all over the place! Can't wait to see what kind of employment we get - and to learn new things!

Cheers!